Self-sabotage and how you can become your own biggest block for your personal and professional growth

Self-sabotage is very common when we are in front of important decisions we have to make that will have an impact in our lives! It can be from something small to something big, as to change job, leave a marriage or working on mental health issue that are blocking our whole life!

For example many people are proud of their burn-outs, yes in plural (!), as they believe these are their rewards for all the hard work they do and all the long meeting and the fully booked agendas. This is what they know that success is and they would hardly let anyone having a word against this belief!

These people have the need to own a problem, a struggle and as long as it exists they have a story to tell, they get sympathy, attention and they prove their selves that they do well, they are right, there is no reason for change. It’s their identity and it’s even fearful to give it up! It’s their pattern!

Consciously or unconsciously they even sabotage the process from going ahead, do things differently and more effectively, see other opportunities, other ways that will bring a combination of happiness and success in their lives!

For other people even getting sick is a great chance to get attention and it really doesn’t matter to them if it’s going to be negative or positive. Even some forms of abuse work this way. And except from the attention, they have someone to blame for all the pain they have experienced, the missed chances, the lack of choices and the suffer. This is the story they say to themselves.

There is a whole brain mechanist behind that.

The common characteristic here is avoidance. Pushing away responsibility. Denial of seeing the truth clearly and accept it. Entitlement mentality. Unwillingness of putting personal efforts and making the changes necessary to create a healthy environment, where the person can grow and develop.

The questions towards a person of this mentality is:

“Who are you without your issues?”

“Are you willing to let them go?”

“How committed are you to make this happen?”

The fact is that we professionals cannot help anyone who doesn’t want to get helped!

Reaching self-awareness in combination with raising emotional intelligence can give a whole new perspective to the way we do things, how we can improve the quality of our lives and see our full potential and all the options available!