Identity is a social construction, this is what you learn when studying Social Sciences.
The construction of the social identity. The social construction of gender, the social construction of reality and so on.
How do we define identities?
The main indicators of differentiation and definition of identities are race, gender, social class, age, sexual orientation, (dis)abilities, ideology, religion.
This works as a social agreement between the members. The way “others” are represented is the key for the understanding of the truth and how reality is structured.
Depending on the group an individual belongs to, they can socially develop a positive or a negative identity. Altering the kind and type of identity depends on a number of factors: the kind and cohesion of the group, the connection of the members, the restrictions of the society itself, the willingness of seeking the opportunities and putting personal efforts, to name some.
The unique personality of each one of us stands crucial in achieving more and better that we do already. That’s why being authentic, recognizing weaknesses and strengths, being self-aware of mistakes, issues and qualities is vital, can give a whole new perspective and bring new ideas and opportunities.
Comparisons between the members and the groups can impact the results.
The thing is how beneficial can a comparison be and under which environments and circumstances. Unfortunately, there is a big chance that comparing completely different models and situation, can cause a number of mental health issues. You cannot compare apples with pears. You need to know where you are standing.
Everyone needs to belong, be accepted and loved. This is what we all aim to, for our entire life!
We want to belong to a family, a relationship, a group of friends, a team, a school or business environment.
We first seek love and acceptance from the parents, then from friends, partners, colleagues, neighbors, children, students, clients and this can go on and on forever.
Nowadays In the western world and living in open multicultural societies, we talk about diversity.
As a Social Anthropologist I find this area fascinating! Diversity needs to come hand to hand with inclusion.
The knowledge of what differentiates us can be the answer to what can help us live in harmony into societies. Colorful mosaics of beautifully unique people. We are called to see reality under this prism.
Categorizing in big groups depending on characteristics or qualities, is a way for societies to easily – and not always fairly – remember and place things in order. When the society defined the “other”, then you have an idea of where you are standing. Whoever doesn’t ’t belong to a group is automatically excluded and put out of the social standards.
We use to say, rich-poor, black-white, right wing-left wing, married-single, educated-uneducated, man-woman, child-teenager-adult. By definition and seeing the pairs, one category excludes the other.
We grow up developing a belief system full of stereotypes, limitations and exclusions.
But how can we practically live under these norms? How can we still have a nice and well experienced life with emotional freedom, practicing all of our roles? Because we have so many!
Does this mean we have more identities then? And how do we combine them?
YES! We have more than one identities and by changing the model we use to observe, we can include more of ourselves and contribute to this world!
We women are daughters, sisters, friends, partners, wives, mothers, stepmothers, aunts, grandmothers, housewives, professionals, motivators, helpers, volunteers, we take care of our beloved ones and people that need us! We are so unique! We are so very active into societies!
On the other hand, we have full agendas that don’ t make us happy all the time. Which practically means that our issues that we usually hide under the carpet, have to be taken care and gradually be solved.
We need to use all the good energy we have, to what fulfills us and makes our purpose clear!
We are Role Models! And the fact is that we women are driven by legacy!
Ask yourself:
- Am I the mother I would like to have?
- Am I the friend I would like to have?
- Am I the woman I would admire?
Then you will get your answers. If you need to work more or change the way you practice some of your roles, it doesn’t mean you are not good or not good enough. It means that being self-aware can help you take responsibility, make conscious decisions, take care of yourself, put boundaries, be self-confident, have faith and trust to what you can do!
Don’ t try to fit in in narrow shoes.
Because you can do better than you do already!
And today you are not the same person as you were yesterday!
Every day you have the chance to grow and become a better version of yourself!
Magda Tsitsoni
Self-Awareness Coach
Creatrix® Transformologist®
Social Anthropologist
